Fast Loan Etiquette - A 15-step Process

The 15-step guide to fast loan glory

Ever wondered how you go about getting a payday loan? Many people have, yet are too timid to pursue their dreams. They think the payday loan demons are going to attack them or something. BOO! HA HA HA HA HA! Just kidding. No ghosts here, just cash advances. For you. For me. For everyone who wants one. Here's how to get it done, in a 15-step process that our staff has compiled to make it easy as can be.

1. So on a three-day bender, blowing through all your cash and maybe even accruing some debt for good measure.
2. Waste at least 12 hours sitting uselessly hung over in front of the television.
3. Realize that you have to go to work, but have no money to get there.
4. Apply for a fast loan online.
5. Remember that you must verify your identity and employment in order to waive the credit check. Be sure you spell your name correctly.
6. Hitchhike to work, since your fast loan won't show up for another few hours.
7. When the funds arrive in your account, plan ahead. Make a list of where you are going to allocated the funds so that when it comes time to repay the fast loan, you won't be caught off guard.
8. Head to the pub for a drink or two after your shift ends.
9. Gorge yourself on chicken wings and cheese fries.
10. Accidentally use the list you made for your fast loan distribution as a napkin.
11. Since everyone in the bar is a really good guy, and you suddenly decide that you love them so much, buy a couple of rounds for all of your good friends.
12. Take a limo home from the bar. It's only a few miles and won't cost that much. And tip handsomely. If the cost is $75, give him a Benjamin and tell him to keep the change.
13. Wake up and realize that you spent nearly all the money you received in the form of the fast loan, and momentarily freak out at the prospect of what on Earth you are going to do now.
14. Have a drink to take the edge off. Hair of the dog, you know?
15. Repeat Step #1. It's your birthday!

There you have it. Fast loans made easy. To consult with an expert about a fast loan, or for further reading material on the subject, check out our Related Resources today.

All material copyright © 2006 Cash Loan Time. All rights reserved.

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